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Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope for Leinster

Printed From: Scarlet Fever Llanelli Rugby Sport Wales Tickets
Category: SOCIAL
Forum Name: BAZ LEWIS' SCARLET FEVER GOLD
Forum Description: Hall-of-fame for the best SF threads, dedicated to Baz
URL: https://scarletfever.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22360
Printed Date: 19 March 2024 at 10:50am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.04 - http://www.webwizforums.com


Topic: Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope for Leinster
Posted By: Sam Cheese
Subject: Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope for Leinster
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:06pm

It is a dark time for the Rebel Alliance (by which I mean Scarlets). The evil empire (by which I mean Leinster) have built a great big round space station, the Royal Death Star Showground.

 
On the fourth moon of Yavin (by which I mean the away coach’s booth in the RDS), the bloke in charge of the Rebels (by which I mean Nigel Davies) is concerned.

 

“The Death Star will be in range is 3 minutes, by which I mean we’re trailing by 2 points and there’s only 3 minutes to go. Which, on reflection, is a much smaller losing margins than even master Yoda predicted,” said Rebel Boss ND.

 

Just then, Princess Leia (by which I mean Laura off of Scarletfever) said “What we have to is fire a photon torpedo into that exhaust vent at the end of that trench (by which I mean kick a rugby ball through the posts thus scoring 3 points). Then the Death Star (RDS) will explode (Scarlets will win).

 

“But how will we get our X-Wings (players) in position? We need a miracle!”

 

Just then, Darth Vader (Leo Cullen) is penalised for not coming though the (Star) gate, thus giving Scarlets (Rebel Alliance) a penalty (crack at the exhaust vent).

 

First up is Jar Jar Binks (by which I mean Rhys Priestland), who misses as per. “Knickers! It’s just exploded on the outside of the port (by which I mean gone wide)”.

 

Just then, Jabba the Hutt (BOD) is penalised for being a ****. Luke Skywalker (by which I mean Wellies) flies his X-Wing into the trench (by which I mean prepares for the penalty).

 

Han Solo (Dai Lyons) flies over in the Millennium Falcon (walks over on his legs) and says “Let’s blow this thing kid, and go home (score the penalty and go home)!”

 

Just then, a Luke (Stevo) hears a ghostly voice – it’s Obi Wan (Ray Gravell) “Use The Force Luke!”.

 

Luke blows us the Death Star / Steveo kicks the penalty and Scarlets win. Horray.

 

In the end, all these idiots then get medals off Princess Leia: The Loyal band of followers of Blackwood Faramir, Will Chips Boromir, Alun of Elrond, Glorfindel mailto:Bryn@man -  

We are ready to create History, we are History, this is our moment in time, in the footsteps of Legends. This is our Chapter. I believe the children are our future. I believe I can fly. My old man’s a dustman.



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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!



Replies:
Posted By: SA14
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:19pm
Actually, they say the Death star will be in range in five minutes in the film.


Posted By: Leoslovechild
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:20pm
It must be great to have so much time on your hands and I suppose you may as well dream here as in bed...Just wrap up warm cos weather is going to be crap and I'd hate the brain that holds this imagination to get a chill!!! and just so you are aware the OLSC will be handing out blue hats and flags at the entrances on Saturday


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:23pm

Thanks for the feedback, SA14. I don't know if you noticed, but I made some other changes that, while not stictly 'canon', were essential for me to realise my artistic vision.



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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:26pm
Originally posted by Leoslovechild Leoslovechild wrote:

It must be great to have so much time on your hands and I suppose you may as well dream here as in bed...Just wrap up warm cos weather is going to be crap and I'd hate the brain that holds this imagination to get a chill!!! and just so you are aware the OLSC will be handing out blue hats and flags at the entrances on Saturday
 
You'd be amazed how quickly I can churn this crap out.
 
 


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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: Ow!
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:27pm
is proctor bib fortuna?

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Gentlemen, gentlemen, I'll never understand. A world of knowledge at your fingertips, and you play poker all night.












Posted By: ladram
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:30pm
lofty's got nothing to worry about.Big smile


Posted By: jonesb
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:32pm
I prefer that to Lofty's drivel anyday (sorry Lofty Embarrassed). I particularly like the last two lines! Still laughing now!


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:37pm
ha ha! superb


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 4:43pm
Originally posted by ladram ladram wrote:

lofty's got nothing to worry about.Big smile
 
See about that, will we.
 
I heard his latest epic is based on bleak BBC 80s nuclear war docudrama 'Threads'. Doesn't sound to promising. In fact I bet he'll change it now he's read mine, the coward.


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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: rolly
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 5:28pm

I was drinking pop as i read that and its gone everywhere now .

Fair play thats good , made me laugh anyway .



Posted By: Gene-Stealer
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 6:42pm
"By which I mean walked using his legs" - that is too Funny
Can I be Boba Fett?
Shane Horgan would be the bloke with an arse face in the bar scene


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"Have you ever met the Genestealer?"
"Met him! He still owes me rent!"


Posted By: Ow!
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 9:04pm
martyn roberts is a jawa. leo cullen actually does look like one of the goons in jabba's palace.

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Gentlemen, gentlemen, I'll never understand. A world of knowledge at your fingertips, and you play poker all night.












Posted By: jeremy windell
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 10:03pm
Originally posted by Ow! Ow! wrote:

martyn roberts is a jawa. leo cullen actually does look like one of the goons in jabba's palace.
Aye, that noe with the snake wrapped round his head like!
 
http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://alexplorer.net/guitar/text/guitar/Bib.jpg&imgrefurl=http://alexplorer.net/guitar/text/guitar/wars.html&usg=__fUGDZZY0ex47pwYLWmaUPX2tzSw=&h=300&w=300&sz=20&hl=en&start=3&itbs=1&tbnid=y8vm6pZB9clPqM:&tbnh=116&tbnw=116&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbib%2Bfortuna%26gbv%3D2%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG">


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Go ahead..........Take those banana's


Posted By: Mrfwon
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 10:07pm
Quality post again!!!ClapClapClap 

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Scarlets!!!


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 10:17pm
Originally posted by jeremy windell jeremy windell wrote:

Originally posted by Ow! Ow! wrote:

martyn roberts is a jawa. leo cullen actually does look like one of the goons in jabba's palace.

Aye, that noe with the snake wrapped round his head like!
 

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://alexplorer.net/guitar/text/guitar/Bib.jpg&imgrefurl=http://alexplorer.net/guitar/text/guitar/wars.html&usg=__fUGDZZY0ex47pwYLWmaUPX2tzSw=&h=300&w=300&sz=20&hl=en&start=3&itbs=1&tbnid=y8vm6pZB9clPqM:&tbnh=116&tbnw=116&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbib%2Bfortuna%26gbv%3D2%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG">


No mate. That's Bib Fortuna. Ow! reckons Bib looks like Wayne Proctor. Can't see it meself TBH.

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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: SMELLYMIKE
Date Posted: 17 December 2009 at 11:28pm
Cheesy by name cheesy by nature................But after reading its posts , i suppose we were lucky it wasnt Noddy and Big years

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I am only responsible for what I say. Not for what you understand


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 9:13am
Originally posted by SMELLYMIKE SMELLYMIKE wrote:

Cheesy by name cheesy by nature................But after reading its posts , i suppose we were lucky it wasnt Noddy and Big years
 
I sense you are upset you didn't get a role in my meisterwerk.
 
Tell you what, you can be R2D2. Doesn't really contribute anything to plot as such, he's just kind of there all the time, and his communications are incomprehensible.


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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: Highburyscarlet
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 9:24am
Originally posted by Leoslovechild Leoslovechild wrote:

It must be great to have so much time on your hands and I suppose you may as well dream here as in bed...Just wrap up warm cos weather is going to be crap and I'd hate the brain that holds this imagination to get a chill!!! and just so you are aware the OLSC will be handing out blue hats and flags at the entrances on Saturday
 
Bit harsh there. It brought a smile to my faceLOLLOL


Posted By: JonWal
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 10:36am
Think I need to be more controvertial on these forums....
 
I didnt even make it to Ewok status Cry


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13


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 11:27pm
Originally posted by JonWal JonWal wrote:

Think I need to be more controvertial on these forums....
 

I didnt even make it to Ewok status Cry


Play your cards right, and you might just appear in the forthcoming Episode V: The Ospreys Strike Back.

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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: maldwyn
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 11:35pm
I was never into all this Star Wars stuff.Bought my son all the paraphernalia (he's 30 now)I wish I'd have kept it..could have sold it to you mugs. 

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Up the bum no harm done.


Posted By: rolly
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 11:39pm
Originally posted by JonWal JonWal wrote:

Think I need to be more controvertial on these forums....
 
I didnt even make it to Ewok status Cry
I was chuffed i was in there till the word IDIOTS was mentioned . Unhappy


Posted By: Sam Cheese
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 11:50pm
Originally posted by rolly rolly wrote:

Originally posted by JonWal JonWal wrote:

Think I need to be more controvertial on these forums....
 

I didnt even make it to Ewok status Cry
I was chuffed i was in there till the word IDIOTS was mentioned . Unhappy


I was only messing. You're only an idiot to the extent we're all idiots for wasting our time on this forum. Also, I must admit I just cut'n'pasted the names off Lofty's post. Tee hee!

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You will know the vengeance of the Lord Humungus! I promise you... nobody... nobody... gets out of here alive!


Posted By: SA14
Date Posted: 18 December 2009 at 11:52pm
They were never called Ewoks in the Return of the Jedi.


Posted By: Gene-Stealer
Date Posted: 19 December 2009 at 8:04am
Originally posted by SA14 SA14 wrote:

They were never called Ewoks in the Return of the Jedi.
 
Wow, you so clever.  Are you wearing your Star Wars pyjamas right now?


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"Have you ever met the Genestealer?"
"Met him! He still owes me rent!"


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 19 December 2009 at 8:57am
Originally posted by Sam Cheese Sam Cheese wrote:

Originally posted by rolly rolly wrote:

Originally posted by JonWal JonWal wrote:

Think I need to be more controvertial on these forums....
 

I didnt even make it to Ewok status Cry
I was chuffed i was in there till the word IDIOTS was mentioned . Unhappy


I was only messing. You're only an idiot to the extent we're all idiots for wasting our time on this forum. Also, I must admit I just cut'n'pasted the names off Lofty's post. Tee hee!


i noticed that. lazy journalist scum


Posted By: The Admiral
Date Posted: 19 December 2009 at 10:13am
As I have not been on the Forum for the last few weeks due to my brother passing away I want to wish the Team and ALL our Faithful Supporters,especially fellow Forum members a SUCCESSFUL day in Dublin, and i am sure we will return home triumphant. GOOD LUCK

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Is that land I see on the horizon, it must be Menorca


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 05 February 2016 at 8:46pm
This was a smashing little satire on the bard of bonymaen, who was trendy at the time. Scarlet fever gold surely?


Posted By: Eastern outpost
Date Posted: 06 February 2016 at 8:09am
First time I've seen this thread, so, Rap, have a thanks for giving this a bump.

Brilliant fun.

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In a world where you can be anything – Be Kind.



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